Am I really this sad?!?!

Wow, this really surprises me. I'm never this sad about stuff. I wanted this blog to be about happy thoughts! Ah well. It's my blog. But seriously I can not stop thinking about...well. Suicidal thoughts! Its crazy! But I just wish people would acknowledged me for just being there! But no. I'm constantly ignored, and laughed at. I just want people to like me! Is that to hard to ask!

Probably, lol. So anyways, at least I got some friends. Cory C, Darion T, & Mac C. Probably the best friends i'm ever gonna get. There the best! Always making me smile and I make them smile. It's awesome. But I had two other friends that were my best friends...But. not anymore. Marcus S, & Matt C.

Marcus, man we hit it friendship the first day we met in 6th Grade. And he was the best! Always almost every weekend we would hang out! But ever since the last day of school in 9th Grade. I called him something he takes very seriously. And all I wanted was him to sign my little autograph book! But he just kept walking away. Idk why, but it got me frustrated chasing after him. So I said "something". He stopped. and walked away. Sucks now. He won't talk to me. I try to say i'm sorry but he won't bother.

Matt, also known as "Hamster" because he looked like one. Haha. He was awesome back then. But ever since 10th grade. He met this girl named Brittney, and well, he just stopped hanging with me, and I guess others too. But ever since he's been hanging with her, he changed alot. Just he was a completely different Matt than I knew. Anyways, I have no problems between Matt or Brittney, I just want to hang out with Matt like old times.

(sigh) wow. I miss having friends. I used to have alot of friends, and 5 BEST FRIENDS. Now I barely got any friends and only 3 Best friends now. I'm afraid to lose anymore.

Mabye for just one day, I would like it if every one in the school just got together and had a big group hug for me. It would mean so much to me man...it would probably make me cry just to know i'm not ignored! : )

Posted by Jacob Sivley/Cooldud21

"PEACEvsANARCHY"