Jacobs Back "B3TCH'ZZZ"!!! :D

AH-HA!!! Got my happy go lucky smile back on me face! Feels great! I can't really believe I was sad about stuff, I knew I just had to give it time and it would go away. But now I feel that I just got to the tip of the iceberg. But I bet i'll be ready for whatever life is going to throw at me next! Karma's got my back baby!

Anyway's now that i'm happy, lets talk about happy stuff! Okah, lets see, well this weekend was awesome. Had a bud over and we just hanged out laughing at stuff people wouldn't usually laugh at which makes it awesome. But the most not interesting thing for most but very interesting for me was that I was on YouTube the other day. And I happen to come across a video that caught my attention, "Fight Zombies with your Bare Hands!!!". I kinda knew it was bullshit because you really can't without getting infected, but I thought it would be funny to laugh at so I loaded it. And it was the most stupidest thing I ever saw. 3 Asian guys (not trying to be racist) "supposedly" knew how to fight zombies with there bare hands. Well I found 2 flaws...
1. It was obvious the 3 guys never bothered to try Karate, even though there Asian.
2. There technique was fucking bullshit...it was that bad
I was very disappointed in this video with the lack of effort and thought. But then they sent me a message from my user ID, and they actually thanked me for the zombie knowledge! That was the first time I was actually thanked for knowing my zombies. I was actually surprized! But now I kinda want to take back the flaws I found in there video. But hopefully they'll make another. :D


OTHER THAN THAT IM HAPPY!!!

Posted by Jacob Sivley/Cooldud21

"PEACEvsANARCHY"

Am I really this sad?!?!

Wow, this really surprises me. I'm never this sad about stuff. I wanted this blog to be about happy thoughts! Ah well. It's my blog. But seriously I can not stop thinking about...well. Suicidal thoughts! Its crazy! But I just wish people would acknowledged me for just being there! But no. I'm constantly ignored, and laughed at. I just want people to like me! Is that to hard to ask!

Probably, lol. So anyways, at least I got some friends. Cory C, Darion T, & Mac C. Probably the best friends i'm ever gonna get. There the best! Always making me smile and I make them smile. It's awesome. But I had two other friends that were my best friends...But. not anymore. Marcus S, & Matt C.

Marcus, man we hit it friendship the first day we met in 6th Grade. And he was the best! Always almost every weekend we would hang out! But ever since the last day of school in 9th Grade. I called him something he takes very seriously. And all I wanted was him to sign my little autograph book! But he just kept walking away. Idk why, but it got me frustrated chasing after him. So I said "something". He stopped. and walked away. Sucks now. He won't talk to me. I try to say i'm sorry but he won't bother.

Matt, also known as "Hamster" because he looked like one. Haha. He was awesome back then. But ever since 10th grade. He met this girl named Brittney, and well, he just stopped hanging with me, and I guess others too. But ever since he's been hanging with her, he changed alot. Just he was a completely different Matt than I knew. Anyways, I have no problems between Matt or Brittney, I just want to hang out with Matt like old times.

(sigh) wow. I miss having friends. I used to have alot of friends, and 5 BEST FRIENDS. Now I barely got any friends and only 3 Best friends now. I'm afraid to lose anymore.

Mabye for just one day, I would like it if every one in the school just got together and had a big group hug for me. It would mean so much to me man...it would probably make me cry just to know i'm not ignored! : )

Posted by Jacob Sivley/Cooldud21

"PEACEvsANARCHY"

(sigh)

In all my life I never felt this sad in forever. And I have no idea what's causing it. Its not like i'm sad for some girl leaving me, (like I ever had a girl :/) or somebody in my family died recently. None of that. I just keep telling myself that people are secretly laughing behind my back and I have no idea what to do. I keep escaping to my music but that just makes it worst. Sure it makes me feel better, but I don't know what to do... It just makes me sad. I may look happy and carefree. Because that's my inside telling my outside what to do. I want to look happy so people don't think of anything of me. But when I do act happy and carefree. I might do something wrong that might make people laugh at me. I hate it so much.

(sigh)

I don't think anybody is really going to read this. But, if anybody is. I need help please. I know some people are helping me now which makes me feel better. But, I want people to know how I feel. I want ALL the people that made me feel bad about myself...to let them know how I feel. I want them to feel sad. Of what they did to me. But i'm focusing all my hate on one person. I won't display his name. But I want him to understand on what he did to me. that's all...

Um, other than that. I guess that's it for this post. I'll post more sooner or later when I get the time. So for all the people out there that get me. Peace.

OH! One more thing! If people really want to know how I feel...They should listen to these songs.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=4N3N1MlvVc4

www.youtube.com/watch?v=KeLGwrlUMTM
(um, its not called lonely day in this one. its called roulette.)

Posted by Jacob Sivley/Cooldud21

"PEACEvsANARCHY"

Too long is too long!!!

Hmmm...haven't posted in a while. Soooo...yeah :P

Posted by Jacob Sivley/Cooldud21

"PEAVEvsANARCHY"